Follow Jesus or Family Luke 14:26-27

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Luke 14:26-27 says that our commitment to Christ will reign over all things, even family.

Living Bible VERSE26 “Anyone who wants to be my follower must love me far more than he does his own father, mother, wife, children, brothers, or  sisters—yes, more than his own life—otherwise he cannot be my disciple. VERSE 27 And no one can be my disciple who does not carry his own cross and follow me.

Meaning that with respect to how much we love and work for God, it might even appear that we hate our family. Surely, we  aren't supposed to hate our families, but it shows how earnest we should be about following Christ and striving to be more like Him. When things become a distraction to our love for Christ, we are also called to cut those things away so that we might remain connected to Christ in heart and mind.

First, we must take this verse in the context of the chapter. Jesus is teaching His disciples, and, like any good teacher, He gets His students thinking. It seems that, if we don’t hate our family, we can’t be Jesus’ disciple. Or is there more to this issue?

Following the statement that we must “hate” our father and mother, Jesus relates a metaphor about a man who builds a house without first counting the cost (Luke 14:28–30). The man finds that he cannot follow through with what he set out to do. He leaves the house unfinished because he cannot pay what is required. Jesus’ illustration helps explain His difficult statement about hating our mother and father—namely, we must count the cost of being a disciple. There is a cost, and that is the point of the passage. In order to be a disciple, we must be willing to give up everything for Jesus. Following Jesus requires commitment and faithfulness, even if our parents choose not to follow the Lord. If and when we are faced with the painful choice of loyalty to family versus loyalty to Jesus, we must choose Jesus. Even if our family members disown us—or worse—for being Christians, we must follow Christ. It is in this sense that we are “hating” our family. Jesus’ command to “hate father and mother” requires us to prioritize our relationship with Jesus over our relationship with parents, siblings and other family members. Of course, it is right to love our family members, and we want them to love and follow God. Elsewhere, Jesus confirmed the fifth commandment that we honor our fathers and mothers (Mark 7:9–13).  Jesus’ statement that we “hate” father and mother must be seen in relation to the whole of Scripture. His point is not that we are to be heartless toward our families, only that we must love Him more. We must not forget that included in Jesus’ condition that a follower must “hate” his father and mother is the condition that he likewise hates “even his own life” (Luke 14:26). Jesus is not teaching an emotional hatred of one’s parents any more than He is teaching self-hatred. The emphasis is on self-denial and absolute surrender. Immediately following is Jesus’ instruction to “carry your own cross”

Some other translations make Jesus’ meaning a little clearer: “If you  want to be my disciple, you must hate everyone else by comparison” (Luke  14:26), and the Amplified Bible says that a follower of  Christ must “hate” his family members “in the sense of indifference to or relative disregard for them in comparison with his attitude toward God.” It is a “hatred” by comparison, not an absolute hatred.

Many Christians will never have to make the painful choice of turning their backs on their family in order to follow Christ. But, around the  world, there are many other Christians who face shunning, disowning, or persecution by their families. These believers, if they are to be true to Christ, are forced to live in a way perceived as “hateful” toward their “father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters” (Luke  14:26). All believers are called to acknowledge the lordship of Christ and show Him preference over all earthly ties. Those who must sacrifice earthly relationships have this promise: “No one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or fathers or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age: homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—along with persecutions—and in the age to come eternal life” (Mark 10:29–30).

Following Jesus means striving to be like Him. He always obeyed His Father, so that’s what we strive to do. To truly follow Christ means to make Him the Boss. That’s what it means to make Jesus Lord of our lives. Every decision and dream is filtered through His Word with the goal of glorifying Him in everything. We are not saved by the things we do for Christ but by what He has done for us. Because of His grace, we want to please Him in everything. All this is accomplished as we allow the Holy Spirit to have complete control of every area of our lives. He explains the Scriptures, empowers us with spiritual gifts, comforts us, and guides us. To follow Christ means we apply the truths we learn from His Word and live as if Jesus walked beside us in person.